Like an outsider ..

I have dappled in a Course in Miracles and never could push through it. Why the caution around it?

You are not alone when you reach out to others and share your experiences.

You were drawn here because you belong . We are all family. It's hard when you make repeated efforts and it doesn't work for you. But you have created your own sacred space and angels surround you. There is so much here for you. Bless you and your mother Lara .

Love from Therese.

The important thing is that all of us have arrived here, and T. Nottingham has crossed those lands before us, so he can guide us.

Therefore, welcome, to all of us ♥

Dear Lara,

thanx for sharing your experience and some of your story which is very similar to my own.

Personally there were three main constructs that I attended for some time in each until I found Ted’s YouTube video on Gurdjieff’s fourth way. It was not the first time that Gurdjieff had been introduced to me, the first time was by a hermit in a sleepy coastal village, but that is another story in itself.

The first spiritual group I became a member of was Alcoholics Anonymous which was a profound experience to be sure, getting a Big Book Thumper sponsor and going through the steps and having my first conscious spiritual experience was mind blowing stuff.

The second group which I attended was a yoga Ashram and learnt and practiced a lot there, the Guru/Teacher there was a huge fan of Gurdjieff’s and would often quote him at Satsang.

Third group I became a member of was a Pentecostal Church which again was very profound and uplifting until they became a political movement and got into politics.

Interestingly I never felt at home in any of those groups until through years of seeking landed here where there is a very clear and concise system that is verifiable and historical. The secular mainstream Churches from my experience have a twisted and diluted version, mistranslated and neither clear nor concise.

The book, The Way Of A Pilgram gives a good account that his search for what the meaning of ‘ to pray unceasingly ‘, could not be answered with any clarity at all by any of the Religious entities he came into contact with until on the road he met someone who had Real knowledge.

There are some of us who are called/led to live a more ascetic life than others, my own journey here was no accident, my ascetic life here living off grid in a small coastal village was years in the making, a broken violent marriage led me to being homeless and then finally getting enough money to purchase a small allotment of land where I am building a shipping container home.

Looking back at my childhood I can see that I was not made for the concrete jungle, I remember watching a movie called, ‘ Walkabout ‘, which starred David Gulpilil, it was about a white woman stranded in the outback and she meets an indigenous man. Ever since watching that movie I was always trying to run away and live with the indigenous tribes of outback Australia and if it wasn’t for this Work I would still be living there totally unconscious and chasing that next nice car, girl, house or job etc.

This Work is transformational, I never woke up in the morning and said, ‘ right, that’s it, no more concrete jungle ‘, this Work and more accurately, the applying of this Work naturally rids us of a lot of falseness and wanting in our life.

I cannot begin to tell you how many friends I have lost over the years since applying this Work or how many times people and other events, including family members have called The Work new age nonsense.

We all get accosted from falseness when we pray and when we make approaches to others in championing The Work, I use these events as verification that I’m no longer on The Path but in it. Also a note here that championing The Work if a chance is there to speak about it took me some years for it to not be egoic and Holier Than Thou, for a while it was just another opportunity to peacock.

Blessings of peace to you and I pray that this discomfort passes for you soon.

Ash.

Hi Lara,

My name is Stephanie Sharon and I just joined the forum today. I’ve been reading/listening/watching Ted’s work for a while.

Your share about the churches was both hilarious and tragic. I’ve had similar experiences. A recent attempt for me was Unity. Unity has a positive history, but I found so many members touting a distorted Law of Attraction mantra, I kept having visions of them dancing around G-d who was trapped in an enormous slot machine they were hoping to hit big with. I had to move on.

Feeling isolated as an Esoteric Christian can feel overpowering at times. Sometimes I think about how isolated and misunderstood Jesus must have felt when he lived on the Earth. His disciples did eventually understand his teachings, but from what I’ve read, it wasn’t until after he died that they really got it, after witnessing the entire story unfold.

Anyway, I’m glad you actively post. I don’t do other social media much, so I hope I will be willing to share and learn.

It appears this forum is in its early stages, which I think is great. In several year’s time we may not have the opportunity to share on such an individual level or have access to Ted as we do now. I’ve seen it with other world teachers who really explode onto the scene, even though they have spent years developing their teachings.

Don’t worry about being a Shaman. Feel proud. We should all strive to be helpful heretics as we address the distortions that have corrupted Christianity from its original Divine intentions.

Love,

Stephanie

This morning I read that Moses stammered when he spoke. I love this. I believe its the first time (in my very early process of reading the Bible with sincerity) that I feel connected to the Old Testament. This reflection of personal 'imperfection' has added warmth to my heart, as suddenly I can relate to an individual in the Old Testament, rather than seeing him as simply 'another Biblical protagonist'. To be relatable .. this is something I seek (in myself & with others) as I explore Christianity. Interesting how a simple passage regarding the 'humanness' of a man who lived so long ago has given me a sense of connection.

I'm not sure who said it but "there are those who are inside the Church who are really outside the Church and those who are outside the Church are really inside the Church" It appears as if there are those who remain relatively unknown like little groups who may be more authentic. Also, it appears to me as if something new is here. I'm not sure if it's because I've became reborn and made alive in Christ thru metanoia ...

and this is the new point of view that comes along with Holy Spirit, but it feels like all things are being made new and change is here. It could just be a symptom of my repentance and surrendering my life, submitting my will and committing my Spirit unto the Almighty Trinity. I'm just willingly going thru the process and trusting in the omnipotence and absolute goodness of God. It's as if I've entered a new world that's always been here. All I can say is put all you have into God and not Christians and if you're going to acquire transformational knowledge do it thru Eastern Orthodoxy teachings. Again, I'm just embracing the journey and process. I'm sure each Church serves it's purpose at it's core though we may not understand the division or it's possible corruption. Trust God, Jesus and the Advocate.

❤️✌️❤️

This does raise questions for me that I have been exploring, such as the contrast between what is called 'new age' & christianity. Yoga, meditation, visions etc are seemingly 'of the devil', according to 'true' christians. Im sincere regarding my openness to being corrected, however I won't assume aspects of life adopted by thousands are sinful just because someone raves negatively about these practices, without any foundation to their opposition. I value scriptural response, wisdom, & patient discussion. I've been listening to Derek Prince, & have played many hours of talks that are for example 'anti alternative belief systems' with an open mind. I had a period where I cleared out my house from 'occult' objects (though some have come back, as the jury is still in deliberation); have searched my heart & ceased most of my prior practices. I genuinely crave guidance & want to do what is good & true. A few nights ago I did dream of a serpent spirit that had taken on the cloak of 'yoga', for the sake of deception .. but is that due to my enquiry & confusion, or is it true? I certainly don't know the answer to this. It seems all my life to this point has been 'of hell', according to most christians. Even the good parts. Sigh ... I continue to remain genuinely open to correction & growth.

I'm not sure. It could possibly be religious pride and they stop growing as Christians.

What did you say? What chat room is that?

I just got banned from a christian forum! I had no idea that there was such division. Honestly. Where is the tolerance? Why don't they guide me, explain, do anything other than shun me? Am I not Christian? I was raised from the dead by the Holy Spirt .. or so it seems to me. Yeshua is the one I turn to day & night. God is my goal. How is this not Christian? Genuinely confused.

I forgot to add GOSPEL on the Gematria post. If you add GOSPEL = 74 also.

7+15+19+16+5+12 = 74.

Lara, I'm just letting you know you're not alone. I'll write more when I get in from work. It gets better, it does.

❤️✌️❤️